Gentle conversation starters for caregivers and the people they love
💛 Quality of Life + Minimum Acceptable Living Conditions
What does “enough” look like when everything else feels uncertain?
What would be the minimum quality of life you’d find acceptable? (being able to recognize loved ones, making basic daily decisions)
What are you willing to accept if it will give you more time? ( Some pain, extra fatigue, needing help with daily routines.)
What are your priorities besides living longer?
What are you not willing to endure or accept, even if it could give you more time? (Being bedridden, unable to communicate, or not recognizing your surroundings.)
What small comforts or routines make you feel at ease — (morning coffee, reading in a favorite chair, watching the sunset)
What are the risks you’re willing to take for more time?
What are your fears if your condition gets worse?
🧡 Purpose + Identity
Holding onto the parts of you that make life feel like yours.
What truly matters to you right now — beyond just staying alive? (connecting with loved ones, continuing to learn, keeping a spiritual practice)
What parts of yourself feel essential to protect (your dignity, your independence)
What small things make life feel like your own (choosing your daily schedule, picking what you want to wear, deciding what to read or watch)
Even if everything else changes, what helps you still feel like you? (Prayer, music, looking at photos, watching home movies
What aspects of your life are you most concerned about losing?
Are there particular scenarios or outcomes you’re afraid of experiencing?
What aspects of your identity are most important to you?
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💬 Communication + Boundaries
Understanding the situation — and being heard in it.
In your own words, how do you understand what’s happening with your health right now?
What have your doctors or caregivers said — and how does that align with your own gut feeling?
What still feels unclear or overwhelming about your situation? How much do you want to know about your condition, treatment, or future? Do you prefer full honesty, even when it’s hard, or would you rather hold on to hope and only hear what feels necessary?
Who do you trust to help make decisions if you can’t?
What level of support feels right to you when you’re making difficult decisions?
🤝 Support + Connection
The people and care that help you feel safe, seen, and loved.
Who are the most important people in your life — and how do you want to stay close to them?
What does real support look like for you (help with meals and/or medications, driving, a companion to watch tv)
What makes you feel genuinely cared for (in person visits, getting mail, being prayed for)
If life gets disrupted, what could help you still feel joy or purpose (visits from grandkids, listing to podcasts, being asked for advice)
How important is it for you to remain in your current home or living environment?
What role do your relationships play in your overall well-being and sense of purpose?
🌿 Spiritual + Legacy Wishes
The love, beliefs, and memories you want to leave behind.
Are there spiritual or faith practices you’d want honored during your care or at the end of life?
What do you hope your loved ones will remember most about you?
Are there stories, letters, or messages you want to leave behind? (A letter to your children, a recording of your voice, a favorite recipe)
What kind of legacy feels meaningful to you?
What would bring you peace as you imagine the final chapter of your life?